Real talk.
I have a tendency to push everyone away and like the cancer I am, retreat into my shell. I get ghost. People start to irritate me. I don’t want anyone in my face. Not forever. Only sometimes. Im moody. It’s a crazy emptiness I feel for people. Like I honestly could care less if I lose some people. I am so use to people walking in and out of my life that now, I rush them out. And not a fck is given. It’s crazy. I don’t remember ever feeling lonely in my whole entire life. Which is weird when I push everyone away. I tend to keep everyone bad for me around while kicking all the good ones out. Everyone is disposable to me. I really feel that all i need is my mother and its middle fingers to everyone else. I am not speaking out of any anger, angst, depression. I sincerely just had an epiphany. I have a habit of cutting “friends” off with no remorse while it’s harder for me to cut a lover off. Weird. I’m so used to being betrayed that I kind of wait for it now. I expect it. So when it happens, I’m not sad. I just keep it moving. And not a fck is given.
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livingthepurplelife said:
Hi Ness, this too is me. I am a scorpio and you could not have read me any better. I try to look at it as I am someone who is not afraid to alone. As sad as the truth really is. But now at 25 I realize that I want friends I can grow old with.
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carmensimonem reblogged this from missnessmari and added:
A true cancer guilty of this, I am.
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